Yes, that's a good word. Less pretentious than 'desire', it cuts right to the heart of the matter. Gil doesn't need love. How strange it would be for Rau to jump right to something like that - but want? Yes, Gil wants to be wanted. Even if that 'want' only consists of curiosity, or even of a malicious desire to tear everything that is offered down after the fact. All that Gil needs is the knowledge that Rau isn't being strung along like some passive observer. Rau doesn't need to kiss him back, as long as he bites his lips. Rau doesn't need to hold him as long as he digs his fingers into his skin like he does right now.
It hurts. Gil isn't accustomed to physical pain - he is neither a frontline fighter nor a masochist. It's only Rau who's allowed to manhandle him like this, without hearing even a word of complaint.
Without another word, Gil undoes the clasp of the mask and lets it drop haphazardly onto the cushions next to them. His hand couldn't move from Rau's face if he wanted it to - and he doesn't want that. He traces Rau's cheekbones with his fingers, just the ghost of a touch.
Rau really is beautiful. What an unfortunate sentiment, circumstances considered. ]
Then I'll give you everything.
[ He's not smiling this time. This declaration is plain as can be, with Gil's general tendency for fancy words. ]
no subject
Yes, that's a good word. Less pretentious than 'desire', it cuts right to the heart of the matter. Gil doesn't need love. How strange it would be for Rau to jump right to something like that - but want? Yes, Gil wants to be wanted. Even if that 'want' only consists of curiosity, or even of a malicious desire to tear everything that is offered down after the fact. All that Gil needs is the knowledge that Rau isn't being strung along like some passive observer. Rau doesn't need to kiss him back, as long as he bites his lips. Rau doesn't need to hold him as long as he digs his fingers into his skin like he does right now.
It hurts. Gil isn't accustomed to physical pain - he is neither a frontline fighter nor a masochist. It's only Rau who's allowed to manhandle him like this, without hearing even a word of complaint.
Without another word, Gil undoes the clasp of the mask and lets it drop haphazardly onto the cushions next to them. His hand couldn't move from Rau's face if he wanted it to - and he doesn't want that. He traces Rau's cheekbones with his fingers, just the ghost of a touch.
Rau really is beautiful. What an unfortunate sentiment, circumstances considered. ]
Then I'll give you everything.
[ He's not smiling this time. This declaration is plain as can be, with Gil's general tendency for fancy words. ]