[ The words are more thoughtful than anything, and again, there’s a fractional delay in Rau’s physical response while he assesses, takes his bearings.
Rau’s scheming meant that he was largely solitary for the last two years of his life. War itself had been isolating; the world narrowed to a single warship or operations center for weeks at a time, and, despite close confines, rank or politics kept him distant from most of ZAFT other than the unlamented Patrick Zala. While most of the armed forces discretely resolved the solitude of service in their downtime or shore leave, Rau had been rather busy with trading weapons and plans and weaknesses across enemy lines, which required secrecy constantly and physical affection only rarely. The mask and polite aloofness and general distaste for most of humanity did the rest. Fllay Allster’s clinging and fluttering had been, oddly enough, some of the closest and most prolonged human contact he had in the months leading up to his death. And then he had simply been dead.
He does not regret it, but remembering how to be close is like adjusting to gravity and solid ground underfoot after months drifting weightless. The stomach drops, the heart beats faster, blood pulses harder. So much more contact, so much more push and pull.
But but he has always handled the reversion to gravity well enough. It’s only ever a matter of taking the first few steps to regain steadiness and control.
He swings a leg over Gil, straddling him without settling in his lap; one arm rests lightly on Gil’s shoulder, and his gloved fingers tangle loosely in dark hair. ]
Your plan.
[ And there, the fluidity and note of challenge are back in place. ]
no subject
[ The words are more thoughtful than anything, and again, there’s a fractional delay in Rau’s physical response while he assesses, takes his bearings.
Rau’s scheming meant that he was largely solitary for the last two years of his life. War itself had been isolating; the world narrowed to a single warship or operations center for weeks at a time, and, despite close confines, rank or politics kept him distant from most of ZAFT other than the unlamented Patrick Zala. While most of the armed forces discretely resolved the solitude of service in their downtime or shore leave, Rau had been rather busy with trading weapons and plans and weaknesses across enemy lines, which required secrecy constantly and physical affection only rarely. The mask and polite aloofness and general distaste for most of humanity did the rest. Fllay Allster’s clinging and fluttering had been, oddly enough, some of the closest and most prolonged human contact he had in the months leading up to his death. And then he had simply been dead.
He does not regret it, but remembering how to be close is like adjusting to gravity and solid ground underfoot after months drifting weightless. The stomach drops, the heart beats faster, blood pulses harder. So much more contact, so much more push and pull.
But but he has always handled the reversion to gravity well enough. It’s only ever a matter of taking the first few steps to regain steadiness and control.
He swings a leg over Gil, straddling him without settling in his lap; one arm rests lightly on Gil’s shoulder, and his gloved fingers tangle loosely in dark hair. ]
Your plan.
[ And there, the fluidity and note of challenge are back in place. ]